What is Love?
The definition of love is: "an intense feeling of deep affection". I think we can all agree that love can present itself in many different ways and what someone may see as a symbol of love others may not. I think everyone has their own way of defining what love is to them or how they receive it.
Yesterday I had yet another surgery, lucky number 30. I had to have bone spurs chiseled out of my ankle as a result of the car crash that I was in (along with Chad, our daughter Grace who was only 11 months old and our dog Brownie) in 2003 when I was 20 years old. I've had this surgery before and will most likely have it again. I've been told that it is something I'll have to go through every several years for the rest of my life. I'm lucky that I was able to keep my leg after our wreck. Chad was told as I was going into surgery that they would most likely be amputating my leg from the knee down because the damage to my ankle and leg was so severe. I can handle having surgery every few years having been able to keep my leg and knowing that my family will be ok.
This week love has shown itself to me in many different, amazing ways. I have received many messages from family and friends. Old friends and new ones have been sending me their support and well wishes for a successful surgery and easy recovery. I have received more than I have for previous surgeries. It was amazing to feel so much love from people that didn't have to go out of their way. I also have so many friends and family who have offered to bring us meals or to order a meal to have it delivered, they have offered to create more work for themselves to make our family's night easier.
My sweet friend Jenna that I've met through The Junior League of Austin is a 3rd grade teacher. She told her students about my upcoming surgery and presented me with a stack of the most precious get well cards. They each made me smile, some made me laugh and all made me tear up knowing that these precious students care about my well being. She is teaching a class of thoughtful children and they decided to send me a gesture of love that I'm very grateful for.
When we got in the wreck Chad and I were in college, we lived in Abilene, TX. I had a friend, Sally, who was the single biggest help to me, Chad and Grace during this very trying and difficult time in our lives. Grace was a baby, Chad's hand was in a cast from his injuries and I couldn't walk. While my left leg/ankle was mangled my right one was severely sprained so I couldn't walk at all for quite some time. Sally basically moved in with us without literally moving in. She spent nights on our couch to help during the night when we needed the most help. She would load me, my wheelchair and Grace in her or my car and take me to my college classes and walk around campus with Grace until I was done and then would bring us all home and get Grace in bed. She would cook for us, give me sponge baths, take care of Grace in any capacity needed and was our angel during such a hard time. I have no idea what would have happened to us if it wasn't for Sally, who was also a student during all of this. Chad worked and went to college at night so she was seriously a life saver for Grace and me. I'll never be able to fully express my gratitude for what Sally did for our family, ever. Sally is family, nothing will ever change that. Sally is more family to me than many people that I'm related to. Sally is the Godmother to all three of our children and even that doesn't feel like enough to express our love for her. Today, the day after my surgery, Chad had to go out of town for a day trip for a business meeting, Sally once again came to take care of me. She is now a busy mother of two (soon to be three) and a NICU nurse and she still came to take care of me. I laughed when she walked into my bedroom where I'm stuck and asked her if she imagined doing this again after 14 years, she smiled. She spent the day with me until she had to leave to pick her children up from school. She spent one of her valuable days off taking care of me and making sure I wasn't alone the day after my surgery.
Then there's Chad. I know Chad loves me, that goes without saying. But,the way he cares for me and is my biggest support for ALL of these surgeries speaks measures. He has been by my side for every single surgery, all 30. We have our "surgery protocol" and "surgery routines" that are well established and he does everything he can to make me feel comfortable leading up to the day of surgery. He holds my hand until it is time to take me back to the OR, he kisses me and reassures me that he will be there as soon as I wake up. He is patient with me when I'm groggy and in pain. He is careful driving me home from surgery, as careful as he was driving our babies home from the hospital. He keeps me calm and comfortable once we are home and he makes sure I'm taken care of. He is my person and he reaffirms why he is every single time I have to go through these scary procedures.
What is Love to me?
Love is waking up from surgery to Chad's face.
Love is receiving so many messages of well wishes from family and friends .
Love is in the letters of precious third graders.
Love is carrying me up and down the stairs.
Love is refilling my Yeti every time I say I'm thirsty.
Love is making sure I'm on top of my medicine so I don't wake up in more pain.
Love is carrying me to the restroom.
Love is making sure I don't fall in the shower.
Love is taking all of the weight off of my shoulders so that I can heal completely.
Love is bringing my family a meal so that Chad can focus on me and our kids.
Love is creating a calendar for friends to sign up to bring those meals.
Love is taking on some of my responsibility in the PTO.
Love is helping us make sure our kids get home from school safely.
Love is in the single flower that my son brings me to make me feel better.
Love is when my daughters come to ask me if I'm ok or need anything just to check.
Love is carrying me to the couch in another room so I can get out of my bed for a little while.
Love is offering to stop by and bring my family anything we may need.
Love is MUCH more than words.
To everyone who has shown me and my family so much love, thank you. I notice each of you and appreciate you more than words can say. <3
Love,
Sara Jane
Me and Chad - Surgery Day
Me and Chad - Surgery #30
Sally taking care of me the day after Surgery #30 (Ignore that I look like a mess).
Precious "Get Well" notes from a class of 3rd Graders.
The flower my Son picked and brought to me to help me feel better.
