Surgery #29

Surgery is never fun and unfortunately something I'm all too familiar with. Two days ago on July 27, 2017 I was a surgery patient for the 29th time.

Most people don't know that I live with chronic pain. I don't like to talk about it and I chose not to let it bring me down. I suffer daily with intense pain in my left ankle, stomach and with pelvic pain. My stomach pain isn't constant (it isn't every moment of every day) but it does affect me most days. My ankle is a constant source of pain and is a result of a terrible car crash that my family was in when I was 20. My pelvic pain is because my body made three amazing kids but was not good at recovering and healing from the trauma that pregnancy and c-sections created.

I've had ovarian cysts since 2007, when my second child was a few months old. It isn't uncommon and sometimes isn't even noticed by a lot of women. My body is the epitome of Murphy's Law and I feel every follicle every time. I have had many abdominal surgeries for various reasons. I delivered all three of our children via C-Section (my first was an emergency and the second two were recommended as a safer option for my body) which is a major abdominal surgery. I've had my gallbladder removed, I had exploratory abdominal surgery, I had my uterus removed, I had a separate surgery to have my cervix and fallopian tubes removed and a few of other laparoscopic surgeries. Due to my body requiring so many surgeries I have plenty of scar tissue which my doctors clean up every time they're preforming surgery but it always grows back, that is just the nature of scar tissue. As far as reproductive organs go all I have left are my ovaries. With the cysts I've been having excessive ovarian pain but have been putting off having one or both of my ovaries removed since I was in my late 20's. I do NOT want to experience menopause or the associated side effects for as long as possible.

But, I just couldn't hold out anymore. I was getting to the point that my ovary pain was making me suffer daily, not just when I should have been ovulating or going through a natural cycle of what ovaries do. I saw my doctor and talked to my former OB/GYN. They both agreed that I've put up a good fight for the past few years but it was time to look into removing an ovary. So, I did.

My doctor, who I adore, opened me up on Thursday and found that my left ovary had adhered itself to my bowel. She carefully cut it out. She said that my right ovary looked healthy but had a lot of scar tissue and adhesions around it/near it so she cleaned all of that up. She also found endometriosis. While I'm still adjusting to having this horrible, painful disease, it gives me a lot of clarity and validation to the severe constant pelvic pain I've been having.

I am incredibly thankful that while I've had so many surgeries and health issues that I know that I'm not missing out. I know several women that have had similar issues that can massively affect fertility, but the difference is that I'm complete. I have three great kids and have known that our family is complete since I had my third child. I don't feel like I'm missing out. I know that I'm lucky on that front. Many women who suffer like I do haven't had children yet or still want to have more and may not have that opportunity.
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So, for all that have been wondering why I had to "go under the knife" again, there you have it. After years of putting it off, I had my left ovary removed, adhesions cleaned up and endometriosis diagnosed and cleaned up too.

I'm a little over 48 hours out of surgery, I'm very sore and doing my best to rest up. My husband (and kids) and my Aunt have been massively helpful and I couldn't be more thankful! I also want to thank my sweet friends Jill and Shannon for my beautiful flowers, my new friend Eileen from the Junior League for dinner and to my countless other family and friends who have checked on me and offered their love and support! You all are so incredible, thank you!!

Unfortunately I will be having another surgery (lucky #30!) in about six weeks. I will be undergoing another ankle surgery. That one will take longer to heal as I'll be having bone shaved and chiseled off of my ankle/lower leg and wax put on my bones so they can glide easier instead of grind every time I take a step. All of the info on that surgery will be for another post :)

Again, thank you to everyone who has reached out to me offering their love and support! xoxo

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

~Sara Jane

Teaching, Volunteering and Skin Care...oh my!

I've had an impossible time accessing my blog for months. On April 17, 2017 I posted the below post on a different blog site. I've finally recovered my original Blogger credentials and can move forward with my intended site. I posted this several months ago but want to add it to this blog site to keep things in order. I hope you enjoy!

~Sara Jane

I have been substitute teaching so much more than my normal recently, but instead of the thought of that stressing me out, I’m really excited for what I have accomplished. I’ve decided to exclusively teach at the schools my children attend (very occasionally I’ll make an exception). The students see me at the school often since when I’m not teaching I’m at the school usually volunteering my time to help teachers and with PTO activities. I love the connection I’ve made with so many students. It is very rewarding to walk down a hall and when my class realizes I’m subbing for them they get so excited and all rush to hug me. It really makes me feel like I’m doing something right! 

Last week I taught for one third grade class for three consecutive days. When I left after school on the last day the other teachers in that grade told me how happy they were knowing that I was the one teaching that class. That when I sub they know I’ve got control over the class and things will be done correctly. It was a small conversation with a big impact. I feel so lucky to have the freedom to teach where I want to when it fits my schedule and am so happy I made the choice to stick with a school where I can make the most impact, no matter how I’m spending my time there, teaching or volunteering. 

I’m fortunate to have a lot of time to volunteer, which is something I take seriously. I am very careful about what I dedicate my time to and I’m intentional with all I do. 

My Grandma Jane joined the Houston Junior League when she was 25 years old (the youngest age you can join; women can only join between the ages of 25-40) and has loved being part of The League since then. She is 86 meaning she has been a member for 61 years. WOW! Now that all three of my children are in school and we have all settled into a lifestyle accommodating to that, I strongly felt that it was my time to apply to be a member of the Junior League of Austin. I had looked into joining last year when my youngest, my son Orin, was in Kindergarten but missed the deadline for mandatory meetings by just weeks. I remember being SO disappointed. I marked in my planner (I don’t go anywhere or plan anything without it!) the dates that I needed to send in any information and meetings to ensure I didn’t miss it again. I attended my meetings, did everything asked of me immediately and am so happy to announce that I was accepted! It was a very proud moment when I made the phone call to my Grandma to let her know I was The League’s newest member. I could hear the joy and pride in her voice. 

The Junior League is a league of women (worldwide now!) who dedicate our time and efforts volunteering for our local communities and making a big impact. I can not wait to get started for my provisional year and see the impact that a group of dedicated women and myself will make. I am so proud to be part of this prestigious League and to work with like minded women who are all eager to help our community in the best, most impactful ways possible!

I was also very recently placed on our PTO Board (for my youngest children’s elementary school) for next school year. Even though my board position officially starts next school year we are all very busy planning to make sure things start out smooth. I was asked by Shannon (our PTO President) to be the Treasurer which I was excited to do having a background in banking, but sadly had to turn down the position. I can’t be the Treasurer and handle cash while being an employee of the district. I didn’t even think about the fact that being a substitute teacher makes me an employee. I’m sure it is because any income I make goes directly into a savings account and I don’t ever really see it. So, I’m not the new Treasurer but I am on the board for “Family/Community Events” which I was excited to accept and to work with my friend Jill, who knows her stuff, and am excited to meet and work with one more lady who will be on this venture with me. 

Between The Junior League, PTO board, teaching, being a mother (of two elementary students and a high schooler in band and AP classes) and being a wife, plus so much more that is always going on, next school year is sure to be even busier than this one has been. I’m a little anxious but I know with proper planning it will all go smoothly. 

When Chad and I were planning our family and were ready to try for our second child, I told him that we could have two more children (we have both wanted three since we started dating as teenagers) but that when we were done having kids that he was going to have to “fix what you’re about to break”. I said this meaning that he had to promise to help me get my body back to as normal as I could get it after having so many children. He laughed and agreed. I wasn’t joking and he knew it but probably didn’t think I would hold him to it. About 3 years ago I told him that it had been more than three years since I had our last child and I was very ready to get my body back. I was the heaviest and biggest size I had ever been in my life, including at the end of my third pregnancy and post delivery. Before I had children I was about 105 lbs and a size 0-2. At the time I told Chad I was ready I was almost 200 lbs and a size 14-16. For some that size fits their body well, it didn’t for me. I was SO unhappy and I didn’t feel like I was in my own body. I hardly recognized myself and the thought of shopping for clothes (let alone swimsuits) was a reason for major waterworks. I told Chad that I was ready for my plastic surgery wanting liposuction and a tummy tuck. He told me to schedule some consultations and get quotes. I did. Of course with both procedures (all of the doctors I saw recommended a lot of lipo) the quote was in the five figure range. I was even more discouraged because while I wanted to be happy in my body again, 10K+ is a lot of money and I didn’t want to take that much from my family. That is the same amount that we would spend on two ski trips! I couldn’t justify spending that much. I cried to Chad and he again told me that he loved me no matter what and thought I was beautiful. He didn’t ignore my weight gain, he embraced it (way more that I did) and told me it didn’t bother him because I became what I was by giving him three great kids. To me his words and sentiment were beautiful but a lot of BS. I wanted to FEEL beautiful and happy in my own skin and i just really wasn’t. It was depressing. 

A few months passed and again I was complaining to Chad about how I felt about myself when he said something that made me question everything he had ever said about me being beautiful to him. He said something along the lines of “Sara, I think you’re beautiful and I am more than willing to spend the money that you aren’t. But, first you need to lose some weight and show me you can keep it off and then I’ll happily spend every penny.” I was in shock. I was so furious that he had basically acknowledged how big I had gotten. He was supposed to tell me that I didn’t look big and that I was beautiful no matter what. Of course a big fight ensued and I cried. After a while I calmed down and really thought about what he said. No matter how mad it made me, he was right. Why would we invest so much money into a quick fix when I would most likely gain it all back with the same eating habits? I accepted what he said and forgave him…and maybe apologized for freaking out on him. I also accepted that I would be fat forever because diet’s just aren’t my thing. I LOVE food. Then I gave in. I started to diet on my own, I was determined to lose weight and I was completely unsuccessful. 

About a year later (just about exactly 2 years ago from now) I convinced Chad to go to a consultation with me at Cedar Park Ideal Weight and Skin with my former OB/GYN Dr. Laurette Smith. She had been my OB for 10+ years and I LOVED her. She left her successful practice as an OB/GYN and opened this clinic which helps with weight loss and spa types of skin care/treatments. So we went in to this consult, with my favorite physician and talked to her about Ideal Protein. She had done the diet with great success and I trusted her that it would work for me too. We pulled the trigger. I did the diet. I did it and it worked! In about five months I got to my goal weight and passed my size goals. I had a pair of size 10 jeans that were my “goal jeans”, when those were too big I was thrilled to be in single digits again. By the time I ended the diet I was in a size 2-4 (depending on the brand). I was over the moon! I’ve maintained for a year and a half now and have been so thankful that I did this diet every single day. This past January Chad made another statement that kind of blew me away, but in a good way this time. He said “Sara, we are going on our anniversary vacation in May, if you want your tummy tuck now is the time, lets do it!” My consultations/quotes were half, some less than half of my original quotes because I didn’t need any lipo and what I did “need” for a little of extra skin from having three kids was so minimal. How exciting, right?! Then I did something I NEVER thought I would do. I told Chad that I didn’t want a tummy tuck anymore. OMG, I couldn’t believe those words came out of my mouth! Instead I went for an option that was even less expensive by thousands than the surgery. I decided to once again trust Dr. Smith and her staff at Ideal Weight and Skin of Cedar Park and am undergoing a few laser treatments to melt fat and tighten my skin. It started with me just doing this on my abdomen and minimal “love handles” but now I’m having treatments done on my face and neck too. It has been awesome! I did four sessions under the Vanquish machine, four with the Exilis Ultra machine and four with the Cellutone machine. I’m done with the Vanquish machine on my stomach but am going to have a little more work done with the second two machines. They do both fat melting and skin tightening. The Exilis Ultra machine is what is also being used on my face and neck. I’ve only had two treatments on my face and neck and can already see some results of diminished fine lines/wrinkles and it is so encouraging! 

Doing these laser treatments was a big commitment for me because I’m the kind of person who needs fast results and clearly a tummy tuck has immediate results. These treatments are not immediate, it takes up to a few months to see the full results. I am still so pleased that I went this route and would recommend it to anyone! I’ll be doing more treatments of several of the services that this clinic offers and am excited to keep you all in the loop! If anyone has any questions about exactly what I’m doing here is the link for Dr. Smith’s clinic, I can’t recommend them enough! http://www.idealweightandskin.com/  I have another round of treatment on my stomach, face and neck this week, I can not wait! Once I’m done with specific treatments I’ll share my before and after photos for anyone interested. If you decide to visit this incredible clinic for anything, a facial, weight loss, laster treatments…whatever, tell Dr. Smith that I sent you! She and her staff are truly the best and extremely professional. I promise you’ll leave happy no matter what service you are doing!

I’m SO thankful to have a husband who supports me feeling good about myself even if he thought I needed it or not, which he insists he didn’t. While I truly believe that he thought I was beautiful in all stages that my body has been through, I can definitely say that he now compliments me out of nowhere several times a day and proves how attracted he is to me almost constantly.  We have been together for 17 years (tomorrow), since I was 16. He has stuck by my side during my very best and very worst physical years of my life. He is my rock and I LOVE living this life as his partner. 

Life is good! :)

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

Sara Jane

School is Back!

After a very fun summer our three children have started a new school year! Grace is now in the 8th grade, Abby is in the 4th grade and Orin is now a big 1st grader!

This summer was a lot of fun for our whole family! It was the least stressful summer we've ever had.
Chad works from home when he isn't traveling for business. This has always been difficult during the summer because young kids don't understand that Dad needs quiet and for them to be calm so he can focus on his task at hand. It's their home and they are allowed to be kids. This summer everyone was pretty chill and old enough to understand that when Dad is on the computer or on a call not to be too loud and let him get his work done. It was really great and a smooth summer break.

We took a trip to Hunt, TX, we love it out there! It is in the middle of the beautiful Texas Hill country. The rest of the summer we did some fun activities and focused on spending time with a few friends and having a lot of quality family time together. It was really the best summer break ever!

Now that our children are back in school we are all in an adjustment period getting back into the swing of things. The kids are happy with their teachers and I'm now trying to remember what I need to do to fill my time and be productive. It is so quiet in the house again, which is nice, but always eerie at first.

I've accepted my first substitute teaching assignment of the school year that will happen in a couple of weeks, I've got a coffee meeting scheduled, my hair and nail appointments scheduled and a few lunch dates coming up.

The beginning of a new school year is always bittersweet for me. I'm elated that our kids are so excited about school and feel very lucky that getting them pumped and eager to learn isn't a fight. But every new year is a very sobering reminder that my time with my children is limited. Next year Grace will start high school, in five years she will be moving into a dorm starting college and transitioning into her own life's journey. They will always be my babies, but my goodness time is flying by! I tell my friends time never moved so fast until I became a Mother, it is so true!

I am making an effort to truly enjoy each day with our kids and create the best memories with them. I am trying to stop worrying about things, like time moving so fast, that I have no control of and to make the best of our time. We have created three amazing little people and they are so much fun to raise! I'm such a lucky woman!

I hope everyone is feeling as lucky and loved as I am! For parents and students, I hope it is a great school year for you all!

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

Sara

Blessings in a Broken Refrigerator

Yesterday our freezer went out, we noticed when our ice cream was liquid, gross. We quickly shut the freezer door and put it on a lower temperature setting to hopefully get something working again. Of course, that didn't work. I also noticed that the fridge wasn't cooling anymore either. No bueno. As usual when something breaks Chad is traveling for business.
As I sat back planning my game plan to get things back up and running I couldn't help but feel really lucky. I know it is a weird feeling to have when a major necessary appliance stops working but I couldn't help it.
I felt incredibly lucky that I have another full size refrigerator and a separate deep freezer in our mud room. I started moving things out of our kitchen fridge/freezer and into our other two perfectly functioning appliances. After that I once again felt lucky (and smart!) that to fix my fridge all I had to do was log into our home warranty website and put in a service request. Our technician just left our home (almost exactly 24 hours after I asked for help) and at a minimum he will have to replace the computer in our fridge, probably the compressor too and at the worst the entire fridge. No matter the damage all I will pay is $75. I am so glad that Chad and I kept up with a home warranty after our first year in our home. When we closed on our house our awesome Realtor team (http://www.shepherdnelsonrealty.com) bought us a home warranty for a year as a gift, Chad and I decided to continue purchasing a warranty and it has already paid for itself.
So, as I sit waiting for a few more days for my fridge parts to come in to be fixed all I see are blessings and know that it will all be ok!

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

Sara

New Adventure

We have some big exciting changes happening in our world! Chad has left his former employer and has accepted a new position with another company. He is going back into contract sales but now in the healthcare sector. He is going back to doing what he loves and is so good at. I'm beyond thrilled for him and so incredibly proud!

It is no secret that Chad had been unhappy for sometime working with Boston Market. He wasn't feeling fulfilled and most of his time was spent "putting out fires" and doing things that were out of his scope along with his true job functions. He is a trooper and always gave his all, but I knew he wasn't happy. A couple of months ago his boss resigned from the company after being with them for 20+ years. That was a big red flag and after having a long discussion Chad and I agreed that he should start looking around for a new job/company. After several interviews and offers that we decided not to pursue one came across that was a perfect fit for Chad and our family. Every single aspect of the new position/company is exactly what we were looking for and we couldn't be happier! It is even better for us financially, we don't have to move and so much more that make this a perfect fit for our family. Chad's last day with his former company was May 2 which is also the same day that he signed an offer letter and accepted his new job.

Chad and I decided that he needed some time to decompress from the stress he had been under with his former company, we mutually decided that he would take a three week break. From Monday, May 2 until today, May 22 we have spent the entire time together having a blast while our kids have been at school and after school and weekends having a great time with our kids. I've posted a few of our outings on Facebook and know that many have been wondering how Chad was able to get out and about with me so much, here is your answer!

In the past three weeks during our "vacation" we've gone to breakfast and lunch together almost every single day, surprised our kids at their school lunches, gone to happy hour with friends, seen a few movies, played golf, spent the day at the lake with friends, volunteered at our kids school, gone to yoga, done plenty of shopping, bought a BMW, strolled the Domain and downtown Austin, took the kids to Schlitterbahn on a school/weekday and so much more. This past Wednesday was our 14th wedding anniversary, we loved having the chance to reminisce and spend the entire day together. Chad was able to 100% decompress and truly relax during his break. He has enjoyed living "the Sara life" for three weeks and is now rested, eager and excited to start fresh with a new company and a new position. We made many memories in the past three weeks and had the most incredible time enjoying each others' company without a single stress in our world. It was priceless!

Here are just a few pics and highlights of our time:

Please join me in wishing Chad a great first day tomorrow and sending him a big congratulations!

Best of luck my love, I'm so proud and happy for you!! xoxo 

Until next time, count your blessings :)

Sara

16 years

It has been a while since my last blog post, we've been busy as usual. My days have been filled with substitute teaching, lunches with friends, family time and laundry...lots and lots of never-ending laundry, among other things.

On April 18 Chad and I celebrated meeting and becoming a couple for 16 years. This anniversary is significant to me because I was 16 when I met Chad, we've now been together for half of my life! It feels impossible. Time is flying by faster than I could have ever imagined! When I was 16, I was a junior at Leander High School and working at Fazoli's. Chad came in one evening with three other mutual friends who wanted to say hi to me and it was love at first sight. I never would have dreamed that our lives would be forever changed from that first meeting. In our 16 years we have had many ups and downs and a lot of sacrifice. The first 10 years of our relationship was full of hard work, school and sacrifice. They were not easy, they were not always happy. Totally worth it, but hard. The hard work, dedication and sacrifice have started paying off in the past few years, we are so thankful! We love being able to spend so much time together and watching our kids grow together. We are both very active in our kids lives and we are able to have so much freedom thanks to those first 10+ years of school, work and sacrifice. I appreciate what Chad has done to make our lives so great and wake up everyday stress free and excited about all of our futures.

I know I've written a few times about how we have made a very conscious choice to eliminate negative people from our lives (regardless if they are friends or family) and keep company in people who add something positive to our lives, no drama or expectations. We have some pretty incredible friends and family and we appreciate each and every one of them! I am certain that life is so great for us in large part due to the people we surround ourselves with. I am just as confident that we are better people, happier people due to the tough choices we have made to remove certain people from our lives. We have removed people that were negative, stressful and not good for our family. For some it was difficult at first but very liberating and freeing, for some it was very easy. Our family and friends that we surround ourselves with say a lot about us and we couldn't be happier with the group that we have, they are all seriously great, authentic people who we have a lot in common with.

Recently more than ever I've noticed the ebb and flow of friendships that mean a lot to me. I still love these friends immensely but we don't seem to get much time together due to what is going on in our individual lives. It is important to me that they know that even if we can't get together as often as we would like to or used to, they still mean so much to me. Friendships change and that is ok, it doesn't mean I feel any different or care for them any less but life happens and circumstances change. We will all get together when it works out!

Since my last post I've had so much fun re-connecting with a high school friend, going to birthday celebrations, going to concerts and making memories with my family! I was lucky enough to go to the Bryan Adams concert with one of my very best friends, Janine, for her birthday and just last night I took my daughters to see the Ellie Goulding concert. Both were such a great time and fantastic music!

My life this week consisted of Chad taking Monday off to spend with me for our 16 year "together" anniversary, Tuesday I went to a yoga class, met with my sweet friend Kim for lunch and then took my daughters to the EG concert. Today (Wednesday) Chad and I had an early breakfast at Torchy's,  I'm (currently) getting my mani/pedi and then I'll start baking treats for a festival for our elementary school this weekend. Tomorrow I'll finish baking and spend part of the day with my friend Jessica and then on Friday I'll be spending the day with my son and his Kindergarten class on his field trip. 

My life is always busy but in the best ways, I am so lucky to be spending my time doing things that make me feel fulfilled and happy.

If I knew 16 years ago when I met Chad how my life would be now I wouldn't have believed it. My 18 year old raver, purpled hair boyfriend has become the best man I could have ever dreamed of. I'm very proud of what we have accomplished in our first 16 years and am so excited to find out what the next 60 hold!

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

Sara

We Survived #sb2016!

Spring Break is over and we all survived! Our Spring Break (#sp2016) was both fun and lazy. We took our kids to Fiesta Texas where we all had a really great time! It was a very memorable family day and we're looking forward to going back soon. The kids and I spent a day at one of my close friends house where Orin decided to be a typical little boy and hurt his head (It was pretty bad at the time it happened but after a couple of days of rest he is now doing much better and we luckily narrowly avoided stitches/staples). We were able to get out for a little bit on the evening of St. Patrick's Day with our close family friend, Dave. Chad and Dave hanging out on St. Patrick's Day is a tradition that I know they both look forward to every year. We had an impossible time finding the beer that they wanted but they were at least able to toast with some Jameson. We got a few things done around the house and the girls spent an afternoon prepping our garden for planting. We also were able to watch some March Madness and are cheering on the Notre Dame Fighting Irish who are still in it! We also met some great new people who turned out to be neighbors! All in all it was a pretty great break. 

We have a few projects coming up in the next few days that I'm pretty excited about! My canvases came in (the family portraits that I had ordered) but they don't look right where I had originally wanted them. Soon my living room and kitchen will look a little different. I'm eager to get everything in its final spot as soon as Chad can take the time to hang it all. I'm not being too pushy but I want it done, yesterday. 

We're about to have some yard work done to really make our lawn pop again and prep it for summer. I'm about to start doing some research on Pinterest on which flowers I want to plant and what to plant in our garden this season. I'm not a good gardener, yet, but I'm trying. It is definitely satisfying to know that we're consuming something that we grew. My family really loves it and I am happy that our kids are seeing the value in having a garden.

Directly after Spring Break I start planning summer activities. I think this is the first summer that we will be skipping on Vacation Bible School. Grace is too old, Abby isn't all that into it and last year Orin had a meltdown not wanting to stay. Looks like I've got a decent amount of research and planning to do! We've got one trip booked and are starting to plan an at least two week road trip. I'm a little anxious about a road trip with our crew, but if we plan it right, it will be absolutely incredible and something our family will remember forever. I'll let you all know more as we really get it set up!

I hope everyone reading this has a great day and week ahead!

Until next time, count your blessings! :)

Sara